I believe “choice” lies in the space between stimulus and response. I’m unaware of the curling scandal, but hyper-aware of the stimulus patterns through my coaching practice. If someone cheated their “stimulus” was a nervous system triggered by “something”. That then set of a timer driving you towards a “response” and in that space is a choice - “do i cheat?” If we aren’t in control of our nervous system then the gap it microscopic and we cheat, usually to keep us safe. If we can learn to manage our nervous system (and a part of the practice is recognising our most common forms if stimulus” then we give ourselves the chance to talk ourselves out of it and remain in integrity.
With this apt illustration and succinct explanation, you’ve accurately described the human predicament, Bernadette.
It’s altogether human to have desires, but the way we move ourselves to satisfy those longings shapes who we become. Tragically, that linkage is often overlooked, to our detriment.
I’m not the best one to comment on the curling controversy, Bernadette, as I have not been following the Games too closely. I suspect it was quickly overridden by the fusillade of other Olympic news. But it is a sad situation if we all need to be policed by referees.
Regarding regulating personal behavior, I have to keep things super simple. That’s why I find Ignatius’ desolation versus consolation construct so instructive. I can easily determine to which destination I am heading by asking myself this one question I learned from Rich Villodas, “Would this proposed action tend to open my heart to be more generous or less?” That should point the way.
Of course, in my case, that guidance is often seen more in its breach than its observance. But I’m working on it.
Thank you for sharing the Villodas quote, Gary. It's a beautiful touchstone. It's not always easy to move through the world with an open heart. And yet...
Canadians aren't immune to it. There are many factors/stressors generally involved that build up for athletes at this stage. Financial pressures, social pressures, media pressures, national identity pressures. Not saying that excuses the behaviour/reaction, but the mental impact is large, and tensions are high.
On another note - I didn't know much about the rules of curling, but when I looked into the double tapping/cheating they are being accused of, it doesn't make sense to me why that is even a rule. Most argue the technique is a disadvantage. It's actually comical how this escalated to the label of controversy.
Makes me appreciate the simpler everyday stories that much more.
“Every decision, however small, is a testament to what we value.” Yes and important to remember every day. As for curling, it is played and popular in the US state of Maine. That’s where I first watched it played.
I’m Canadian and I love curling, and was a bit embarrassed by some of the goings-on. But the stronger reaction was shock that in this sport such actions would play out. It was a good remind to remember the how. The end does not justify the means. Thanks Bernadette
You're not alone, Dale. I know many proud Canadians who were saddened by what happened. On a positive note, the fact that this was so discomforting to many speaks volumes about what your nation holds dear.
Love it Bernadette!
I believe “choice” lies in the space between stimulus and response. I’m unaware of the curling scandal, but hyper-aware of the stimulus patterns through my coaching practice. If someone cheated their “stimulus” was a nervous system triggered by “something”. That then set of a timer driving you towards a “response” and in that space is a choice - “do i cheat?” If we aren’t in control of our nervous system then the gap it microscopic and we cheat, usually to keep us safe. If we can learn to manage our nervous system (and a part of the practice is recognising our most common forms if stimulus” then we give ourselves the chance to talk ourselves out of it and remain in integrity.
Thanks for sharing this explanation, Lee. It makes perfect sense.
With this apt illustration and succinct explanation, you’ve accurately described the human predicament, Bernadette.
It’s altogether human to have desires, but the way we move ourselves to satisfy those longings shapes who we become. Tragically, that linkage is often overlooked, to our detriment.
I wondered how the news went down in Canada, Gary.
How can we do better, my friend?
I’m not the best one to comment on the curling controversy, Bernadette, as I have not been following the Games too closely. I suspect it was quickly overridden by the fusillade of other Olympic news. But it is a sad situation if we all need to be policed by referees.
Regarding regulating personal behavior, I have to keep things super simple. That’s why I find Ignatius’ desolation versus consolation construct so instructive. I can easily determine to which destination I am heading by asking myself this one question I learned from Rich Villodas, “Would this proposed action tend to open my heart to be more generous or less?” That should point the way.
Of course, in my case, that guidance is often seen more in its breach than its observance. But I’m working on it.
Thank you for sharing the Villodas quote, Gary. It's a beautiful touchstone. It's not always easy to move through the world with an open heart. And yet...
"In the end, the choices you make when nobody is keeping score are the only record worth chasing."
Really great reflection Bernadette. Also, sports at this level just get weird.
'Also, sports at this level just get weird.'
True, Michael... and yet we're not used to Canadians being the ones drawn into that weirdness for the wrong reasons.
Canadians aren't immune to it. There are many factors/stressors generally involved that build up for athletes at this stage. Financial pressures, social pressures, media pressures, national identity pressures. Not saying that excuses the behaviour/reaction, but the mental impact is large, and tensions are high.
On another note - I didn't know much about the rules of curling, but when I looked into the double tapping/cheating they are being accused of, it doesn't make sense to me why that is even a rule. Most argue the technique is a disadvantage. It's actually comical how this escalated to the label of controversy.
Makes me appreciate the simpler everyday stories that much more.
'It's actually comical how this escalated to the label of controversy.'
I hear you, Michael. It's the media's job to find 'the story' - the one we'll pay attention to for a few seconds longer.
When the dust settles, I hope we'll come around to having the conversation about the pressures that gave rise to the athletes' reactions.
Me too.
“Every decision, however small, is a testament to what we value.” Yes and important to remember every day. As for curling, it is played and popular in the US state of Maine. That’s where I first watched it played.
Were you ever tempted to take part, Virginia?
Ha ha, not a bit tempted. My brother and nephews love the weather in Maine. I prefer to only visit in summers.
Beautifully said, Bernadette. Timely. Relevant.
Thanks, Michael. It's lovely to see you here.
I’m Canadian and I love curling, and was a bit embarrassed by some of the goings-on. But the stronger reaction was shock that in this sport such actions would play out. It was a good remind to remember the how. The end does not justify the means. Thanks Bernadette
You're not alone, Dale. I know many proud Canadians who were saddened by what happened. On a positive note, the fact that this was so discomforting to many speaks volumes about what your nation holds dear.
Bernadette it’s always a pleasure to read you!! ❤️❤️